I guess



At first, it was just a little drip drip
then it hemorrhaged into something more
soon I was sitting in a pool of it
surrounded by it
watching it creep out from me in a big circle

It became clear
some time ago
I wasn't going to make it
not at this rate

And all I can say is
I guess I'm fine
because I still hear the questions
and I say it all the time

I guess this is okay
the way my life is dripping away
spreading out from me
like it can't get away fast enough

I guess it's okay
that I went the wrong way
made the wrong turn
got sucked into this decay

I guess it's okay
that my loneliness won
and I can't see past my hand
because I'm losing too much blood

I guess it's okay
the way things feel today
because I know tomorrow
is going to feel worse

I guess it's okay
that I think so much about God
because I want this to be over
I want to go home

These are my mistakes
and I own them
I stand in them
shake them clean and dissect them
look around for solutions
but solutions are sticky and hard to find
when they're covered in your blood

There is no quick answer
there is no easy fix
there are no helping hands
putting you back together
it's just you and these blank walls
staring at each other
trying to see through each other
trying to feel anything
but the drip drip from your soul
the new wounds on top of old wounds
the nagging sores
the open wounds
bleeding into each other.


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