Ya gotta start sometime


Jimmy Eat World's The Middle was released in 2001 on the album Bleed American. The lyrics to this song were important to me, as they spoke of peer pressure and the need to conform. I was at a point in my life when I really started missing my education. I was wondering if I'd ever get a chance to go back to school. I saw everyone moving on with their lives, getting real jobs, and I was just a hardcore kid paying the rent.

So, too, Jimmy Eat World's A Praise Chorus spoke to me. I remember listening to this song when I was 24, 25, 26. So, when the song says, "Even at 25, ya gotta start sometime," I agreed. I felt like my time was coming, but I also felt it was too late to go back to school at the age of 25. And 26, well, that was really old. Here I am, 41 and taking classes. Clearly, it's never too late.

These songs are important to me still because they reveal a lesson I started learning a long time ago. It doesn't help to compare yourself to others. We're all on different paths. I wish I had stayed in school and gotten a good education. I didn't. I can't change that. In an age where everyone is putting their very best on social media, it's a really unhealthy thing to compare yourself to all of those perfect lives. Chances are they aren't that perfect anyway. Even if they really are that perfect, it's neither here nor there. You can't live their lives.

My biggest challenges have been me dealing with myself, not with other people. I can't help what other people do or what they think of me. In Jimmy Eat World's video for The Middle, you see the conformists merrily doing their thing, but the two kids who can't conform find each other somehow, and at the right time. Everyone has a vision for their life, and my life just isn't going to look like that perfect vision I had for myself. I have to accept that. I can't conform to that ideal, whether it came from my mind or from society's mind. I can, however, live the best version of my life starting right now, starting with what I have. 

There are a lot of ways this post could have gone. Also, there were a lot of ways my life could have gone. I wagered everything I had on the direction I went, and when I had to change direction, I wagered hard again. I don't know many people who are so willing to change their lives as I am. I see people sit and complain about their lives endlessly, and I'm just thinking, "You can change anything. If human beings have the power to do anything, it's to change." How many years do you want to work at a job you hate? How many times do you want to hear yourself complain about your spouse, the weather where you live, the government? I know what it's like to be stuck. I know the despair. But, when that door opens and you have your chance to change, take that chance. Please.

There are so many anthemic songs from my youth that spoke to me. I was a Straight Edge kid, and then I was a hardcore kid. A lot of my hard-fought ideals have crumbled. I've seen myself crumble too, my body and mind weakened through so many traumatic experiences. I'm a humble man now, but I used to be a firebrand. I accept what's come and what has gone from my life. I'm thankful for every day I have, whatever the challenges and whatever the love that may come. Here's to it never being too late to start over, to try again, to do whatever it is you want to do. 

The Middle lyrics:

Hey
Don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on
Just try your best
Try everything you can
And don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away
It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be all right
Hey
You know they're all the same
You know you're doing better on your own so don't buy in
Live right now
Just be yourself
It doesn't matter if that's good enough for someone else
It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be all right
It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be all right
Hey
Don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on
Just do your best
Do everything you can
Don't you worry what their bitter hearts are going to say
It just takes some time
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be all right

A Praise Chorus lyrics: 

Are you going to live your life wondering
Standing in the back looking around?
Are you going to waste your time thinking
How you've grown up
Or how you missed out?
Things are never gonna be the way you want
Where's it going to get you acting serious?
Things are never going to be quite what you want
Even at twenty-five you got to start sometime
I'm on my feet
I'm on the floor
I'm good to go
All I need is just to hear a song I know
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine
I wanna fall in love tonight
Are you gonna to live your life standing in the back looking around?
Are you going to waste your time?
Gotta make a move or you'll miss out
Someone's gonna to ask you what it's all about
Stick around nostalgia won't let you down
Someone's gonna to ask you what's it's all about
What are you gonna have to say for yourself?
I'm on my feet
I'm on the floor
I'm good to go
All I need is just to hear a song I know
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine
I wanna fall in love tonight
Crimson and clover, over and over
Crimson and clover, over and over
Our house in the middle of the street
(Crimson and clover, over and over)
Why did we ever meet
Start in my rock and roll fantasy
(Crimson and clover, over and over)
Don't don't don't let's start
(Crimson and clover, over and over)
Why did we ever part
Kickstart my rock and roll heart
I'm on my feet
I'm on the floor
I'm good to go
So come on Davey, sing me something that I know
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine
I wanna fall in love tonight
Here, tonight
I wanna fall in love tonight
Here tonight
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine

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