Brotherly love part 1

The above photo shows a bit of family togetherness, with my dad's Honda road bike (a short-lived financial excursion) as the glue. Considering the financial difficulties at the time this photo was taken, it makes sense the bike was not a permanent fixture in our lives. I remember the one and only ride I took on this bike with my dad driving me home after school, me clinging for dear life, bobblehead helmet on, looking like some sort of alien.

Hotel room stays always meant I got the rollaway bed or cot. Youngest children frequently get the short end of the stick, and not just genetically. Older siblings (especially the oldest) get the best of everything. Youngest children get leftovers if there are any. But I didn't know that at the time. I just thought I was special to have a different bed. I think the above photo was taken on our family trip to Disney World in the mid-80s. An awful lot of old photos show the three boys not wearing much. We must have been tremendously hot all the time. Going from South Dakota to Florida, I'm sure we were. But the explanation for the rest of the near-naked photos is beyond my grasp.

Many photos are goodbyes. The above photo with the old whatever it is (Chevy Citation?) shows Jason going off to somewhere. (He graduated, moved away for a year, then lived with us for a couple of years I think, then went off to college.) The back of the car is heavy with the weight of his luggage, etc. I have no explanation for his pants. I'm sure they were comfortable. The photo below that is a typical wrestling match, often with my dad as the instigator. My mom always said my dad liked to wrestle with his boys because he needed physical touch but didn't know how to hug his boys. If that's true, then why did he almost kill my oldest brother during one of those matches? Above, it's just the boys. 

The last photo is at the condo at Sand Key, Florida (just across a bridge from Clearwater, as I recall), which my parents were allowed to use over Christmas break through the early- and mid-90s. If Jason came with us, I didn't sleep in this room. I recall sleeping on the couch or floor. The pecking order was rigid. We didn't mix things up to keep things fair. To this day, I automatically take the lowest position chair/seat/room/bed/relationship when entering a new situation. It explains a lot of why I often accept and expect so little from every situation. That pecking order is still a part of my programming. Maybe it is a humble way to look at life, but it has not served me well. Nonetheless, my life is in God's hands. If He wants to exalt me in any way, I will be sure that won't come from me, as I have clear programming to accept inferior situations. 

I should also point out that what looks like a unit of three brothers was, most of the time, two units: my two older brothers and then me, sometimes combined in a unit of three. Those two were closer than Jason or Jon were with me. They lived together many years (through college and years after) until Jon and Jason's new wife had a falling out. They have had a strained relationship ever since.

After poring over literally thousands of photos, it's clear there was a lot of love and care in my family. No one is perfect; my parents and brothers and I all did our best with what we had at the time. I reach out to my brothers frequently but almost never receive replies. I have gone above and beyond to have some sort of communication with them just as I have other relationships. Some things a man just has to let go. This is probably one of them. 

Thank you for reading, and God bless.