Another Night (Real McCoy)
Now for some real music! Haha, okay, what is a guy who grew up on hardcore posting a euro-dance hit from the 90s? Because it's awesome! (The kids say it slaps.) I would flip back and forth on the radio between alternative and dance in the 90s. A lot of kids were into one or the other, but I craved all of it. I love music, and this song is still a favorite. It may not be the best Real McCoy had to offer, but we all heard this back in the day and danced a little in our econobox cars on our way to the future. And here we are in the future. Some of us still remember what life was like back then. Are we where we thought we'd be all these years later?
Honestly, I didn't think I'd make it this far. Thought I would be dead. No joke. Having the opinion of a foreshortened future is a symptom of PTSD gained from childhood trauma/abuse, which I endured. Common with everyone who endured longterm trauma. So, I can't complain. Pay stubs and bandaids. Paying bills and doing dishes. Watching TV and taking walks. Some unexpected things happened along the way. Got married (didn't foresee it playing out like that). Had a kid (he was a curveball, as well). Got a divorce (which I originally sought more than 10 years ago). Somehow ended up back in Nebraska. Bought a lot of cars (I admit my problem). Went to a lot of shows (still have all the stubs — Fugazi was my first show). Got to fall in love with my dream girl — twice! Got hooked on God. Still swear a lot, unfortunately. Still have trouble sleeping and not apologizing when someone hurts me. It's been an interesting life. Would I like the guy I turned out to be? I would envy his ride, but that's about it. I was a hard kid. Smart, but hard. God softened me, made me forgive, and poured His love into me. Now I try to love others who are as hard to love as I was. I learned love is never wasted. So, please, love one another. Do it until you can't love any more, and then do it more. I'm digressing and skipping to the end at the same time.
This song came out in Europe in 1993 and didn't make a splash in the U.S. until 1995. There was a lot of dance music on the airwaves back then. I don't understand what's on the radio now, so don't ask me to expound upon the current state of music. It's a mess. Country music is drinking and cheating. Pop is mostly Taylor Swift, which is fine, except she's a witch. There's a lot of music that sounds like someone went straight from the lobotomist to the mic and recorded what came out. The state of music today (and probably going way back) is the product of the CIA's (read: Vatican's) attempt to change society. Robert Sepehr recently released a video that speaks of that. Dave McGowan wrote many books, and one spoke about this subject, as well. It's a multigenerational thing. It's clear programming, but sometimes you have to kick off your shoes and dance a little! Who cares if the lyrics don't make sense. What would Marky Mark do? Feel the vibration, of course.
What is this song even about? Hooking up is my guess. I have no clue! I never listened to the lyrics. Too busy dancing in my Civic's cloth seats and blasting its Blaupunkt stereo to anything and everything. You were young once. You did it too. Maybe you're still doing it. This is music for people who are tired of thinking. College students. Ravers. Dropouts. And me!
The music and lyrics are overwrought and comical. It's like candy for your ears. Not good for you, but it's okay once in a while. Too much of this will probably rot your brain. Then you'll need some thinking music. Cue the Bad Religion. Which will rot your brain another way. Maybe that's why I ride with the radio off these days.
This blog is coming up on six years in January, when it will probably end. It's been a wild ride. Naturally, if something huge happens, I will post an update, which no one will likely read. Who knows? Maybe an asteroid will level my town. Or aliens will abduct me. Six years is long enough, especially after I realized how healed I am. This blog charted a trajectory from suicidal and insane to clothed and in my right mind. (Really, I was in an incredibly bad place when it began, and had no one to talk to, thus the need for this space.) I have no one to thank for healing but God. I planned a final post after the girl I've been seeing for more than a year cut me loose one last time, but that didn't happened. That post may never see the light of day. It is poetic and sad, and it's fine if it never makes it out of draft. Over six years, I wrote an unprecedented volume of love letters to a girl named Cindy, which I hoped she would read and feel how much I loved her, though we were separated by distance. I even took some of those writings and put them in a book and gave it to her on her birthday years ago. Only one copy was printed. But, I can say I'm a published author, though my audience was her alone. All that was a highlight of this blog. (There was one thing I never talked about that concerned us, and I recently made peace with it. There's a reason for everything. I just have to accept it.) The best thing about it, though, was charting my journey with God. I'm not there yet, but I'm adamantly clawing my way. My time on God's earth may not be as long as I think, so it's time to stop burning daylight for nothing. I apologize if I left anyone hanging. I have word puzzles to do and a Nintendo Switch I need to learn how to use. And closets to organize. Thank you for following this strange journey. I needed to heal, and that's why I came here (this blog as well as this town). Now, I feel completely free to move forward or move on or whatever God blesses. My life isn't perfect, but it never was. I'm doing well. Better than I've been in decades. Sending this message in a bottle out to whomever wants to read it. I wish I could hug everyone who followed along, even if they didn't stay until the end. To anyone who stayed, I'm crying as I write this, thinking of you. Thank you. I hope you felt something worthwhile in all those words.
***
Realized something while reading the book of Ruth, and that is that she basically asked Boaz to marry her, at the urging of her mother-in-law. She was widely regarded as a virtuous woman, yet she set the ball in motion to marry Boaz. Yes, godly women can make it clear what they want when it comes to relationships and marriage. The book of Ruth is a wonderful picture of how God redeemed His people and married His Bride (the church), so it's a wrinkle on that, as well.
My few remaining posts are unwritten. I may write nothing. I may write about cats. Okay, not about cats. As always ...
Thank you for reading. And God bless.
Christian blog: a-better-hope.blogspot.com
Comments
Post a Comment