A portrait of godly marriage (1 Peter 3), part one
Written several weeks ago, this post still holds true. I waited for a good time to post it, but I don't even know what that means. So, this is as good of a time as any. I'm working on part two, which takes some verses from Ephesians.
I'd like to marry again someday. Sometimes that thought scares me. Sometimes it excites me, especially when I think about one woman in particular. Actually, it's just her that excites me, regardless of the relationship status (I think we are friends.). But, anyway. This post is about marriage, and a good portrait of godly marriage is found in 1 Peter 3, which follows.
3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. 7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. 8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: 9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. 10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: 11 Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.
I included more than I need with the quoted text, but (call me crazy) I believe it still applies to the section about marriage! It's for the general audience, but it also applies to married folks. This section is a good look at how a godly marriage should function.
We look at the woman's role first. A lot of people look at the first part and think it means a woman should not dress attractively. I think it means outward appearances should not be the emphasis, not that she should appear plain or shouldn't take care of her appearance. (Feel free to disagree.) The focus is the heart and what comes out of it. When I read these lines, I think of one woman. I believe in the sight of God that woman is of great price. When she was married, even though she married a man who treated her poorly, she still subjected herself to him just as Sara did to Abraham. She is exceedingly rare in all ways. I wish there were more women like her. Perhaps more marriages wouldn't fail if that were the case. But, when a man finds a woman like her, he gladly tosses aside all thoughts to keep looking. He's found something of immeasurable value. His spirit knows and agrees.
Then we go to the man's part. Yes, fellas, we have work to do. We are to honor our wives. (And give ourselves for her as Christ did the church.) When it says the weaker vessel, I take that to mean how a piece of fine china is treated. She is special and should be treated with honor, and not like a paper plate. Handle her with care, for she is irreplaceable. Her role is different from yours, and she is built accordingly.
Being heirs together of the grace of life means you're doing this together. Not for one or the other. But together. If a man doesn't treat his wife as he should, it could hinder his prayers. It is important to have the right attitude toward one another. And then it finishes with some general exhortations, but they also apply to marriage. The exhortation is always to love one another, and that certainly applies to couples. Sometimes it's hard. Love is more than a feeling.
I don't know the future. I write about marriage in this post because it was put on my heart. I may never get there, but I hope to, and if I have a choice, I know who I want to take that step with. She is the woman mentioned in 1 Peter 3 and Proverbs 31. She could easily make a marriage work with any man, I believe. She is truly a gift from God and would bless any man. If all I can have is friendship with her, I'll take that. I learn so much just by being around her. She is the most admirable woman I've ever known. I don't say that just because I am insanely attracted to her on a physical level (and I am), but because I am attracted to her on every level. She is truly something special. I spent so much time talking about her, so I won't go into detail again. We all know how I feel. Pardon me if I can't help but exude praise for a praiseworthy woman.
Perhaps this thread has gotten tired. It's exciting for me, though. I have a lot to give. I recently talked to someone I haven't seen for probably close to two decades. They said I am a precious man who will be a blessing to anyone who is in my life someday. It's not often someone says something so kind to me. Yes, I desire to be a blessing to and to honor the woman I marry. My heart swells with the thought. I will lift her up and not put her down. I will carry her when she is tired. Minister to her when she has a need. Help her heal if she is hurt. Pray with her when she is concerned. Speak peace to her when she is worried. Hold her when she cries. Hold her when she laughs. And just hold her whenever I can. Life is hard. Marriage is two people who decide to do life together. When one falls down, the other pulls them up. When one is cold, the other warms them. When one needs grace, the other provides. I like the idea of working together and upholding and supporting one another. Isn't that the point? Isn't that love?
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Maybe I’m writing circles around myself. But I feel there is great worth in marriage. The devil knows how powerful and unstoppable a godly couple can be against him. He does everything he can to make relationships not work or be hurtful. I think of how amazingly healing and life-affirming something like sex is in the right order in marriage, and the devil does everything he can to subvert it, weaken it, cheapen it, etc., so it's hurtful or unhealthy or debased. He wouldn't put so much effort into trashing something unless it had great power and worth. And that applies to everything else about marriage. The devil turned sex into a dirty word and sullied marriage. But, done the way they are supposed to be done, they are incredibly powerful and blessed. I have a godly desire to marry a godly woman. But only God Himself can give such a beautiful gift.
I spent the first night in my new apartment. It isn't the grandest of abodes. Okay, it is pretty humble, but it has a lot of space, storage, and a dishwasher! It's farther away from my son than I wanted to be, but he'll be with me often anyway. For some reason, I have a great aversion to buying and preparing food. I've looked into the meal kits but haven't made a decision. Maybe I'm just lazy. I honestly didn't expect this process to move so quickly. I got a job and a place to live. God did this. Anyway, I think I'll be okay here. I'll just have to walk more closely to God and not try to figure out everything myself. Also, I bought a plant. It already feels more like home. Help me name my plant?
By the way, it's a bit of an odd thing, but my old kitty, Inky, is going to live with my son and his mom. Inky was my cat. She and the other two went to live with a woman my ex knew after our divorce. Well, the woman died, and the other two cats, as well. Little did we know Inky was homeless for a month. I said she should come here. So she is. She's an old cat now, but I bet she'll remember me. I'll have to visit her. She can sit on my knee like she used to. Life is weird. Sometimes things that go away from you come back. Be thankful if that happens to you. It can be a blessing.
An added note: I plan on doing a mini-sermon one of these days on Psalm 107. I haven't had much time with the whole moving and working thing. I should have more time in the future. If anyone actually tunes in and watches those, thank you.
Thank you for reading. And God bless.
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