Things that make me smile - part 1

Keanu can make anyone smile. He's the internet's boyfriend.

I've spent so much time nailing down problems in my life, trying to understand them, trying to move through very hard situations, that I've become very tired of that process. Writing about all of that usually comes at the end of that process, so by that time, I'm really tired of it. So, let's talk about something else. 

I read recently that men are more emotionally closer to their dogs than people. Truly, a dog is a man's best friend. I have thought a lot lately about getting a dog, but my life may change again, and soon, so I don't want to bring an animal into an unstable environment. Dogs are creatures of habit, and they get stressed out when things change a lot. Hey, I get it. I'm that way too. 

So, maybe I can't have a dog right now. But, what else can put a smile on my face? What brightens my day? Be it big or be it small, there are many things that put me in a better mood. When I started thinking about this, I was surprised by all of the things I enjoy about life. I've spent most of my life trying to find the silver lining, so it wasn't hard to come up with a whole lot of awesome stuff. Maybe it doesn't look like much to you, but to me, it's all great. An obvious thing that should be on the list is sex. Cus, yeah, sex always puts a smile on a person's face. I suppose if I wanted to, I could find a girl to bang one out with, but there's only one girl I want to have sex with. Because sex to me is more than just two bodies doing something; it's a union of souls. And I don't want my soul to bump up against just any old girl.

Dogs. I've made jokes before about dogs and pets in general, but I really do like dogs. We had dogs when I was growing up, and I always had to clean up after them, being the youngest. That's where my aversion comes from. But especially if someone else is going to clean up after them (aka other people's dogs), I think they're about the best thing in the world. Some are grumpy, though. Leave those alone.  

Frozen Bean Vanilla Latte. Oh. My. Goodness. If I had my druthers, I'd put this in my coffee every morning. Or in every drink. All the time. 

Chamomile tea. On the other end of my day, chamomile tea with either honey or stevia fills in. It's a nice, easy way to drift off the end of my day. Sure, I have to get up in the night and pee because of it, but I'd probably do that anyway. Because I always wake up at least once in the night. 

My son. I probably should have said this one first, since he puts more smiles on my face than anyone else. Yes, sometimes he's a small-but-mighty monster, but his main goal in life is to have fun. I get that. We have a lot of fun together. He loves it when I put him up on my feet into the air and drop him on the bed or on a pile of blankets. Or when we do "chopsticks," which is me trying to pick him with my legs as chopsticks. Reading has always been a fascination for him. I'll read to him as long as he wants me to. Sometimes I change the words of familiar books, which makes him laugh. "No, dad, that's not how it goes." I'm always making things up because I like to hear him repeat the weird stuff I say. His memory is ridiculously good. It's good to know someone listens to what I say. 

Cheetos (or other salty snacks). Yeah, I know, they're probably not good for me. Processed food rarely is. But Cheetos make everyone happy. 

Watching movies with my son. He likes his movies. The Good Dinosaur. Zootopia. The Incredibles. I like watching with him because we're both quiet and calm and just enjoying a moment. It's an uncomplicated thing. 

Cindy. Yeah, this one should probably be higher on the list, too. I just love that girl. Thinking about her makes me smile because she's made of something incredible and rare and perfect. I truly missed the boat by not marrying that girl. If there is any chance I can rectify that, I will. In all reality, the most I can hope for is to be her friend again. If I can have that again, I'll be over the moon.

Bacon. Maybe I shouldn't list all the foods I love because the list is long. But bacon is definitely a smile factory. 

The sound of gentle rain. Notice I didn't say, "thunderstorms," because those sometimes wake me up in the night, and that's annoying. I like to sleep. Go away, wind and rain. But the sound of gentle rain is one of the most soothing sounds on the planet. It's like having a cottage at the beach and hearing the waves break. Those white-noise sounds are beautiful and relaxing like nothing else.

Kids playing in the park. What is more joyful than witnessing a bunch of kids having fun? Well, joining in, of course.

This was a relatively tame hair day. The beard, however, looks a bit Amish.

My crazy hair when I wake up in the morning. It's strange having hair again. I have so much hair because I don't want to spend money and go get it cut all the time. It just looks hilarious when I wake up, like Don King (if y'all remember him) or that guy on the show Ancient Aliens. 

Little girls. Okay, chill out. This isn't going there. I just love how open and free and beautiful little girls are, how easily they smile and wave and make you feel special. This is why I always wanted a daughter. During a shopping trip a while back, a girl who was probably under 10 years old said hi to me out of the blue, and her mother shushed her pretty good. Don't say hi to strangers at the supermarket. I get it. But it made my day. 

Tumblr and Spotify. This combination is more calming than just about anything I can think of. I lay on my little loveseat, my legs dangling over one end, my pillows strategically positioned, and just scroll and like and reblog until my eyes tell me it's time to brush the chompers, put in my night guard, and get comfier in bed. It's a nice way to end my day. 

Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. I love cars, which is how the show always starts. I love coffee, though I don't go out to get it. And who doesn't love comedians? I guess some are an acquired taste (Will Ferrell, anyone?), but in general they're great. This show always makes me laugh. 

Mornings. I didn't used to be a morning person. But I love them now. There's something about the promise of a new day that's thrilling. Those first few hours when you're awake unravel slowly and with purpose, and they set the tone for your day. My general impatience to greet the day wakes me up sometime in the early morning hours, and I get out of bed and decide it's too early to stay up, say some prayers, and hopefully fall back asleep. That usually tides me over until 5 or so, when my body finally says, "Get up, silly. Today is your day." If I didn't go to bed at 9 p.m., I couldn't afford to get up so early. It's a tradeoff I'm willing to make. 

Snow. Yeah, I know it's a four-letter word, especially around here. But you have to admit, those first few snowfalls of the season are magical. The world looks perfect and pristine and white and endlessly beautiful. Before the drudgery of winter converts me, it's safe to say snow is one of God's many gifts. 

Windows. I love sitting by windows. I love the feeling of being close to outside, even if the weather is gray. I'm glad my apartment is above ground and has plenty of windows to catch late-day sun. It makes my small space feel a little bit bigger. 

Cleaning. Yeah, sometimes it's hard to get started, but once I get started, look out. It's addictive. My son loves to clean. I have to keep him supplied with disposable wipes at all times. I seriously don't know where all the dust comes from. But he can take care of it in no time. Sometimes we even go downstairs and clean the office when we get in the mood. Is that weird? I love cleaning! Maybe the chemicals have altered my brain. Need something cleaned at your house? I'll help you out. 

Baths. Sadly, I don't have a bathtub anymore. But just the memory of baths is enough to put a smile on my face. When I was on vacation this summer, I made use of the bathtubs every night! 

Making someone happy. I think that's the biggest thing I miss from being in a relationship. Just making someone's day a little better. It's a great feeling. 

Porches. No, not Porsches — the cars — although I'm sure those are great too. I love sitting on porches. It's better when you have something to watch, like cars driving by or people living their lives. I like to make up things about their lives. Give them odd names. Secret lives. Incredible destinations. Torrid backgrounds. Lamentable situations. Terrible in-laws (probably true, actually). Or superhuman powers. Hey, why not? 

Everything autumn. Of course. I've said this before, as I've probably said a lot of these before. But autumn begins in my birth month and ushers in many swift and beautiful changes before winter's onslaught.  

Hunting. It's the crunch of the grass under my boots. It's the crisp air, the feeling of winter bearing down and me out in it, taking from it. It's not about killing something. It's the searching and inserting of myself in nature, a part of the food chain. Even if I don't get anything, I made an appearance. I did my duty to secure our natural resources for future generations. It's the feeling of cold steel in my gloved hands, seeing my breath on the wind, matching my aging senses against the brilliance of my prey. If I walk away empty-handed, the feeling is still the same. I participated in the oldest game known to mankind. 

Clean sheets. Especially after taking a shower, clean sheets are heavenly. Sliding your clean body into clean sheets is orgasmic. Well, okay, what's really orgasmic is doing something dirty in those clean sheets, but, hey, let's keep it clean here. 

Stay tuned for part two! And thanks for reading this silly post.