my careless contagion

Where are the ups? They are, seemingly, nonexistent. At least for me. It seems other people have their ups. Maybe I chisel away at the ups because I know the downs will be worse if I experience the ups to their fullness. By protecting myself from the fullness of the ups, the great disparity between the ups and the downs is not felt. Something like that. Anyway, here are a couple memes that pretty much sum up this blog.  Any retrospective is bound to be cringe-worthy. This one is especially so. Just think, when I get to heaven, I can replay my life. Won't that be fun! I think I'll hide when they're doing that. Is there a fast-forward button? I'm praying for that. Anyway, one thing is sure; it will all be over soon. Sooner if I get my prayers answered.  Life doesn't make any sense unless you understand the spiritual battle, the cosmic chess match, so to speak. Read Job if you want to see how God antagonizes and plays with the devil, motivating him at will to do God...

  Sometimes I daydream about her. Oh, perhaps sometimes isn't the right word. I daydream about her often. She will never know the lovely things I conjure for us. She wouldn't understand anyway. I built a whole life for us there on the other side of the wall. The wall will always be there, but so will my dreams about her.  When you love a woman who is far away, somehow, some way, you find a way to be with her. It may seem like madness to some, but they live only on one side of the wall. Never do they cross over. Me, I'd like to live on the other side where the dreams live. My body is here, so I always have to come back.  Sometimes I see her walking with me. On a beach in the sun. On a sidewalk lit by streetlamp at twilight. Down the hallway to the bedroom. She is beautiful. And I am damned to eternal longing. She is gone, so far away, and I am lost in dreams. Sometimes, when I walk alone, I talk to her like she hears me. But she doesn't. No one is there to hear me. My h...

The story of the woman with the alabaster box has been preached around the world in every country, just as Jesus said it would. It is a very important depiction of a believer's relationship with Jesus, as I will try to reveal. It is a special story I hope to do justice. Below is the excerpt from Luke (Luke 7:36-50), though it is found in each of the gospel accounts. It appears there are two similar, separate accounts of two different women. One involves Mary , brother of Lazarus. She is named. This woman is not named, though she is designated a sinner (aren't we all?). This particular account occurred about a year before Jesus was crucified. It could be she knew Jesus would die for her sins. We don't know. What we do know is she knew Jesus was the Savior. She was genuinely repentant and full of love for Jesus. But, there is more to the story. Let's begin. *** 36  And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee's ...

Follow me by John Denver was released in 1970, a full seven years before I was born and 50 years from writing this post. Some songs are timeless. This is one of them. Written about his first wife, Annie, John Denver penned a simple folk song that continues to make sense today. At least to me. I admit I have odd taste in music, but this one seems to have universal appeal. It is, of course, a love song. And people will always fall in love. The lyrics are below. *** It's by far the hardest thing I've ever done To be so in love with you and so alone Follow me where I go what I do and who I know Make it part of you to be a part of me Follow me up and down all the way and all around Take my hand and say you'll follow me It's long been on my mind You know it's been a long, long time I've tried to find the way that I can make you understand The way I feel about you and just how much I need you To be there where I can talk to you When there'...

If I could liken autumn to a woman (Autumn, is, after all, a woman's name), she is the one who leaves (an unintentional pun). She is in the fading phase of a relationship. She's still there, but she is also gone. Her beauty is more achingly sweet because you know your time with her is short. I have my own memories of a time like that (and she was truly beautiful as she said goodbye). I savor those memories because they are the last time I had her, if a man can ever truly have a woman. Because a woman can change like the seasons. You think you know her, but you don't. All you will ever know is she changes, and sometimes without warning. One minute you're walking together, and the next she's gone. Just the memory remains, and you ask yourself who will drive your soul . The only answer is the breeze. The chill on the air reminds you winter is on the way, and autumn is the warning. Winter is a cruel, yet beautiful season. Those who heed autumn's warning will surv...

Why is it so many of the hardcore songs I listened to in my youth have come true? From Guilty of being white by Minor Threat to Los Angeles is burning by Bad Religion, it's safe to say hardcore music is prophetic. So many spoke for so long about the direction we were headed. And now we're here. Rollins. Social Distortion. Face to Face. Samiam. Fugazi. The Descendents. If they had anything at all to say about society, it is seen as prophetic now. I could spend years just writing about this. We slid farther down the rabbit hole than I ever imagined. But I'm digressing already. The hardcore anthem Small man, big mouth by Minor Threat talks about a specific type of man. You know the type. He's small but he walks with his chest out, shooting his mouth off at every chance. He wears shirts that say things like, "It's not the size of the dog in the fight but the size of the fight in the dog." He's abrasive and looking for a fight. He has something to ...

But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name. (John 1:12) Opinion by Greg Graffin still resonates deeply with me, as does the entire album on which it is found , American Lesion, released in 1997. The album, released in November 23 years ago, was Greg Graffin's first solo release (he has three now). Greg Graffin is most known as the frontman and principal songwriter of Bad Religion, the seminal hardcore band founded in 1979. He's also a doctor, as he has a Ph.D. in zoology. At one time, he was one of two leading index fossil scientists. Index fossils determine the age of the surrounding strata in which they are found, which helps gauge the age of other fossils when carbon dating isn't likely to help. So, he's a scientist. He's also an author and has written many books over the years. His interests are varied, and they all inform each other. This album was written after his div...

  The story of Jesus, Mary, and Martha (Luke 10:38-42) has long interested me. It is a short story that says many things. I pasted it below from the KJV. Let's get started. *** 38  Now it came to pass, as they went, that he entered into a certain village: and a certain woman named Martha received him into her house. 39  And she had a sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus' feet, and heard his word. 40  But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. 41  And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: 42  But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her. *** The story is something many of us can relate to. While we are busy doing our service, others are, seemingly, loafing. As we saw in the story ...

The night before kindergarten started, you fell asleep with your hand in mine, beneath your baby blanket that didn't cover your legs, and your head on your "Go," the stuffed helicopter you had since you were a toddler. It felt too much, too soon. Weren't you still my baby boy? It's clear we have you only for a time. You are borrowed. You belong to God, but this time with you is a gift He wants us to have.

Father and son package. Inseparable. Neither are anywhere near perfect, but they love each other a lot. Could you make these guys a part of your life? Could you take my hand and teach me — and my son — how a real woman loves and cares for those she loves? Do you have a big heart and beautiful soul? My name is Joshua. That's my son, Isaiah. That picture was taken this summer at the end of a long day of playing. We were both sweaty and tired, and one of us was way past his bedtime (you can see it on his face). My son is almost 6 years old. He's all I have in this world besides God. I'd like to share my life with a nice girl. Are you a nice girl?  First, my son. He's hyper. He's sensitive, too. He's a bit overwhelming. He's loud. He's fun. He's also super bright, but I'm pretty sure he has a learning disability. He may also be on the spectrum. I'm not sure. He is often overstimulated by ordinary things. Someday, someone will tell me what ...

I love the story of Jesus and Lazarus. I relate the story below so we're all on the same page. This story lends so much insight into the mind of God and His attitude toward human beings, His tremendous, out-of-this-world kindness, and grace. And, it contains the shortest sentence in the King James Bible: "Jesus wept." For those who think men cannot or should not cry, look at our Savior crying over His friend Lazarus, even though he was about to raise him from the dead. So, let's get started. ***  11 Now a certain man was sick, named Lazarus, of Bethany, the town of Mary and her sister Martha. 2 (It was that Mary which anointed the Lord with ointment, and wiped his feet with her hair, whose brother Lazarus was sick.) 3 Therefore his sisters sent unto him, saying, Lord, behold, he whom thou lovest is sick. 4 When Jesus heard that, he said, This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God might be glorified thereby. 5 Now...