my careless contagion

The girl I loved chose to break things off with me nearly four years ago, for which I never blamed her. It was puzzling for a while, but eventually I worked through it. And she was right. She just wanted the best for herself and everyone else. We all want that. This post is an honest assessment of what happened and how I finally processed what occurred four years ago. My intention is to sketch the kind of man she chose — the man who chose her long ago.  Superman is a fictional character, but to that woman, the man she loves is a type of Superman. I settled on this, not only because it makes me look better because she chose him over me, but because it is the truth. I was blinded by my anger and had to let that go. It was a humbling process, but I believe that process is complete. So, let's do this, shall we? This is a sketch because I never knew the man, just what she told me about him. I'm sure it's all very accurate, as she is a precise human being with an exceptional memo...

Father and son package. Inseparable. Neither are anywhere near perfect, but they love each other a lot. Could you make these guys a part of your life? Could you take my hand and teach me — and my son — how a real woman loves and cares for those she loves? Do you have a big heart and beautiful soul? My name is Joshua. That's my son, Isaiah. That picture was taken this summer at the end of a long day of playing. We were both sweaty and tired, and one of us was way past his bedtime (you can see it on his face). My son is almost 6 years old. He's all I have in this world besides God. I'd like to share my life with a nice girl. Are you a nice girl?  First, my son. He's hyper. He's sensitive, too. He's a bit overwhelming. He's loud. He's fun. He's also super bright, but I'm pretty sure he has a learning disability. He may also be on the spectrum. I'm not sure. He is often overstimulated by ordinary things. Someday, someone will tell me what ...

*"Can't Hardly Wait" by The Replacements. I love this song. It's grammatically incorrect, but that doesn't seem to bother me. It was included on the soundtrack of the 1998 movie of the same name starring Jennifer Love Hewitt. If you've watched a fair number of movies set in high school, you're aware of certain tropes that exist. There's one that I call "That Girl." You know the girl, the one the (usually) shy guy wants to be with. She's amazing; she's out of his league. She's that girl, the one he's pined for forever. She's the one who can elevate his life in ways he can't even imagine. It could change the whole course of his life if he could just get that girl. Somehow, mustering up the courage or doing whatever is necessary to get that girl would change him from being a loser who nobody knows into somebody. My "That Girl" got away, and I let her get away. The year was 1996. It was one of the most...