my careless contagion

It’s August The sun shines brightly The wind blows soft and warm And reeks of summer’s fecundity What I know and what I knew Are strangers in the night I’m enraptured by make believe And outraged by reality Such is summer Some say August Is summer’s last gasp I say it feels like nothing I’m supposed to have thoughts Ideas and feelings But they left me Long before August I was supposed to be something Destined to be someone But all I wanted was love I would have run To the edge of the world for it It was never there No matter the season Now it’s late Far too late She’s gone and I am too As the song says Some things you can never get back Like the happiness in her voice Before whatever happened happened Long before August Long before now Writers write because They want to capture something Or someone Something they’re missing Or never even had But they want it back all the same I write because it is August All this time I felt I lost her But the truth is sadder She lost me Long before Au...

I don't know if anyone is still reading here. If not, that's fine. But this post is something I rarely do. I'm asking for prayer. If anyone reading here prays and has a moment, please say a prayer for me because I am not doing well, even relative to how I am normally.  Backing up a bit, I feel God gave me a directive Jan. 6, which I immediately requested a confirmation thereof and believed I got the same night. I won't say exactly what either of those things were because I feel I've been wrong to do that sort of thing in the past. It is embarrassing if or when either 1) it becomes clear I haven't heard God's voice or 2) I am not able to perform what I feel God told me to do. So, I will leave the details out and simply ask for prayer regarding this situation. I need to know if I heard God's voice and because of past experiences, I'm unsure if I'm hearing the right voice. That puts me in a rather bad position, but my prayer is God will open the doo...