my careless contagion

By no means am I old but sometimes feel that way. I'm not on any medications. Am fairly active. God blessed me with good health. Still, I've been around a while and sometimes feel the weight of that. Here follow some things that painfully point out the fact that I've been on this planet a while. In case you wonder just how long, most would say I'm from Generation X. You know, the ones who grew up feral. If some of this sounds familiar, as if I've already talked about it, well, that makes sense. That happens when you get older. Grab a hot chocolate and pull up a chair. Let's get it on.  1. Young people. They have a lot of confidence that comes chiefly from being young. Just wait until the world makes you cry until you realize you know absolutely nothing, then get back to me. That's not bitterness speaking. But you don't know what's holding the world up until you realize it's certainly not you. Younger people have different expectations and don...

Can we try? Can we wade into this together, holding on to one another? This is such a beautiful thing. Please don't worry. Let's enjoy the journey. We don't have to see the whole way. We can trade knowing the future for knowing we're in this together. You and me and yours and mine. Let's do it. Let this thing we don't know what to do with grow from uncertainty to something we can't imagine living without. Please take my hand. I don't want to do this with anyone else.  This thing. It grows. It can take over our hearts silently. We wake and feel something undeniable blossoming within. Let's do this together and call it what we want. No one says it has to look a certain way or progress along a certain path. It's ours. We can take our time. We can press pause. We can jump ahead. Just as long as we do it together. We can meet. Talk. Lay in silence, you in my arms, and me keeping time to the sound of your gentle breathing and the sweet rhythm of your h...

You could call this a New Year's post: a bit of a look back and also standing on the edge of a new year, hoping for the best.  Let's start from right here, right now. I can't adequately explain what I'm going through because I lack perspective. Anytime we go through something that feels like change we momentarily lose perspective. That's why I felt the need to temporarily isolate myself from influences such as social media and greatly diminished my computer use. (No, it hasn't affected my ability to send my mom memes.) What I can say is something in me broke, leaving my attitude toward God and others changed. I have a strangely calm feeling similar to dissociation but without the disconnectedness. I feel tremendous peace. God showed me why I often attempt to do such hard things against all odds. Hard to explain. Best to save the explanation for later. What I know is it feels important and am committed to doing my part so God can finish the work He started. Doing...