my careless contagion

34) I'm hideously bad at small talk. (Actually, I have no interest in trying.) I usually state the obvious. And then I begin to plan an escape. Is there food? Do I need to pee? Can I watch TV? Sit down? Hide? Stare at my shoes? Suddenly feel ill? Take a nap in the coatroom? Oh, holy hell! Help me! I can talk for hours about something I'm passionate about, but I don't care about the effing weather!  35) Sometimes I'm driven beyond reason. I think a healthy drive in life is great. But sometimes I get fixated on something and it becomes more important than food or anything else. It is very odd. Normally, I'm a laid-back individual, but, at times, I am possessed by a particular goal. Nothing suits me and nothing is okay until it is accomplished. While this may sound normal and healthy, I assure you, it is not. 36) I have a wicked temper (at times). I don't think it gets me in trouble, but it can be alarming. We all have stuff to work on, right?  37) I sing as loud a...

Do I really have 100 reasons why I suck? We'll see! The suspense is killing you, I'm sure. Why am I doing this? Glad you asked. I realized along the way I smeared some people on this blog, two in particular. I was hurt and angry and now I don't know how to go back and change that. Not only that, but I probably made myself out to be something better than I am. So, in an effort to rectify, I will list 100 of my character demerits.  I was going to divide this into three posts to make it easier to read, but I'm pretty sure no one reads here anymore. Yeah, okay. I'll divide it up just in case. Since it is taking me so long to finish this post, don't be surprised if I repeat a few of the reasons I suck, which is probably another reason I suck. 1) I'm an idiot. We'll come back to this later.  2) Even my son calls me "Bappy," which apparently isn't a good thing. Definition number two here seems oddly appropriate.   3) iPhone. Say what? I got an iPh...

She found me lost and alone wavering like a metronome born into a hateful world she swallowed me in her arms and I was never the same One woman can change a man  one love, one touch, and one forever if you don't believe me just look at me now She loves me at my worst lifts me up when I feel done grants me access to a new world where I don't have to be perfect She's knows I'm just a man but treats me like I'm better, made of something swift and strong and forever young She also sees the scars etched deeply in my flesh I stand naked before her but she never judges What I am is changed her love changed me rearranged me put me back together better even made me look at myself and not hate what I saw Now I see why God gave woman to man what a blessing, what peace what a stunning realization so different from what I've always known And so I love her, too,  the same as she loves me with everything I have until my last breath what a beautiful woman to make such an ugly m...