my careless contagion

Just Say Thanks: Cultivating Gratitude Deepens Intimacy With God is a book by R.T. Kendall, published in 2005. On one of my last walks in Nebraska, I found it in one of those neighborhood lending libraries common in white-people places (19th Ave and 41st St., I think). When I saw the title, I knew it was for me, because God was impressing the importance of giving praise and thanks in all circumstances. It was like it was placed there for me. People often wonder what God's voice sounds like. Well, it's like a strong thought, and it aligns with the Word. (Not all strong thoughts are aligned.) It takes some practice to hear it properly, but once you are attuned and trust it's Him, it becomes easier.  Anyway, praise and thanks in all circumstances. I was following through with doing so, even though I didn't feel thankful. It's good when our feelings are in line with what we're doing, but it's not always possible. Praise and giving of thanks is an act of our will...

This post will no doubt raise a few eyebrows. But, I discuss my theories here sometimes, so bear with me. Believe whatever you want to believe.  My God is a jealous God. I went the other way from Him most of my life, only to be brought back. My God jealously fought for me and sought me out, and put me into situations He knew would crush my resolve to lead a life He could not bless. Eventually, I ran back to Him, mostly because He took away all other choices!  I gave my life to God when I was 15. I don't mean that I accepted Jesus as my savior then; I did that when I was a little boy and many times, actually. I mean I gave my entire life , every second, every moment, every breath to God. It was a promise I made. Then I rescinded it and did my own thing because following God is hard . But God didn't forget my promise, and that's why He chased me so zealously in the intervening years. I put a lot of idols in my heart in that time (really, anything that prevented me from...

I never thought I'd be typing these words, but here goes. I was named to the dean's list for the 2018 fall semester of the school I'm taking online classes from.  While this is surely no big deal to the hundreds (thousands?) who found themselves on this list, for me it was no mean feat. Considering I was dealing with a significant amount of personal trauma, and I was working full-time and taking classes full-time, as well as trying to put my life back together, I think that's a significant achievement.  I'm trying not to toot my own horn, but I also need to express gratitude and recognize when something good happens. I give thanks to God for the opportunity to take classes again, so naturally, I give thanks to God for helping me make the dean's list as well.  It feels good to see hard work and perseverance pay off. I hope my education — what little I'm able to attain — will open doors for me and be a blessing to me the rest of my life. Who knows?...