my careless contagion

Blue Clear Sky describes how the girl I adore seemingly came out of nowhere, dropping right into my lap. Does the song describe our relationship? No, there aren't a whole lot of love songs out there. Call me a liar, if you want. What most people think are love songs are actually lost-love songs. But I digress already. This is about the surprise of love finding me after giving up.  Yes, that’s us getting ready for an event. Surely it’s not her favorite photo of us, considering her hair is still wet, but I love looking at her, especially in the mirror. There's something about seeing the one you love in front of you in two ways.  My engagement to the girl I love is recent, and the irony is not lost on me. When the song talks about the "little lie called love," I understand. That's what I thought love was. Then it hit me like a lightning bolt out of the blue, clear sky. She is real. What we feel is real. She feels safe and loved — two things I said she could have with...

How many years did I wonder about you? I asked God if you were even out there, if there was anyone for me at all. So many times I asked Him about you, gave Him a list of things I wanted, begged and pleaded, eventually giving up. And you gave up too. We walked alone so many years, or with liars and cheats, people who couldn't love us, couldn't see us. I flung myself at brick wall after brick wall, hoping someday something would stick. I only broke myself. Finally, I abandoned the search. On Christmas Day, I gave up, mourning a last unsuccessful bid for love. My eyes turned toward God, accepting defeat. I laid my heart at His feet. I told Him to give it to whomever He wished.  You said you gave up too. I wonder if you laid your heart at His feet like I did. What did He do with those two hearts at His feet? Did he see how they fit? He surely did. Those two searching hearts, abused for so long, abandoned and neglected. How easily they fit together, like they were made for one anoth...

What follows is a text message — directed to the author of this blog — minus personal details, including the woman's name. I haven't logged on to this blog since last year about the time of my last post, shortly after the blog eclipsed 40,000 hits. Now it's nearing 50,000. The reason I came back was to correct something: I was wrong. There was a happy ending, as the following reveals. My next post explains more.  I include much of her message because it answered many whispered prayers over the years. No, God didn't answer how I expected, but, when we let Him lead, we must trust He has what is best for us. If you're wishing for a partner, the Lord knows your heart. Do not expect any gift to be given without testing. God needs to know if you can handle the gift. Otherwise, it will ruin you.  What follows is a love letter, but, unlike so many on this blog, I didn't write it. It was written to me. She said it first. She said, "I love you." It was important...