my careless contagion

This post is addressed to a particular person who won't read it, as she permanently left my life more than a year ago. However, forgiveness is, by its nature, selfish. This is for me. Because I made a public display of my affection for her and the outfall of whatever it was we had, I felt it necessary to make a public declaration of forgiveness. Again, this isn't for anyone but me. I must forgive. I do forgive. I have forgiven. I will forgive. As many times as it crosses my mind, I forgive.  There were no words to describe what happened. It was the single biggest hurt of my already painful life. Some may say it wasn't that bad, but it's not on them to decide. The one who was hurt decides how they feel. It sent me to a primal, destructive place from which I am still returning. There is no doubt I loved her, and still there exists a residue of God's love in my heart for her, but my feelings were staunched long ago.  It was the single saddest thing that happened to me....

Save Your Tears by The Weeknd was a popular pop song a few years ago. Can't say I know much about the artist, other than he probably sold his soul to the devil, but, hey, that's how you do business in show business. Digressing far too early. It's the weekend. So let's listen to The Weeknd!  This song is a typical "love" song where love isn't involved at all, obscuring true love and substituting a vile replacement. It's a heartbreak song. It's a lost-something song. Maybe it was love but probably not. Anyway, it's gone. I just like the music. The lyrics are bleak. That's one thing about popular music. The music and lyrics don't agree, carrying two different experiences. Maybe that's why I often make up my own damn lyrics. Y'all be putting poison in your songs.  This video is preferred to the official because it isn't grotesque. It's just some cars doing some choreography while the the singer sings his hit song. Straightfo...

I admired Emma Watson for years. Please don't misunderstand. This isn't a fetish. I'm not obsessed; I just think she's incredible. Lovely, really. However, in this post, I will discuss something else that appears to be going on with her. Warning : this post is very long and contains approximately 100 photos. I spent months gathering information and hours writing it. While some may never understand what I relay in this post, others may immediately understand. I do understand because I share much with Emma Watson, strange as that may sound. We are both programmed. I realize this blog is dead, but it is my only means to share this information (perhaps Google is censoring me anyway, and if you're tired of being censored, join PocketNet, and while you're at it, upgrade your email to ProtonMail). Yet another thing I've lost. Still, I pray those who need to read it are brought here. Freedom is available! Email custerliving@gmail.com (I don't use that email for...