my careless contagion

Joey Baby Don't get crazy Detours, fences I get defensive I know you've heard it all before So I don't say it anymore I just stand by and let you Fight your secret war And though I used to wonder why I used to cry 'til I was dry Still sometimes I get a strange pain inside Oh Joey if you're hurting so am I Joey Honey I've got the money All is forgiven Listen, listen But if I seem to be confused I didn't mean to be with you And when you said I scared you Well, I guess you scared me too But we got lucky once before And I don't want to close the door And if you're somewhere out there Passed out on the floor Oh Joey, I'm not angry anymore Joey Baby Don't get crazy Detours, fences I get defensive I know you've heard it all before So I don't say it anymore I just stand by and let you Fight your secret war And though I used to wonder why I used to cry 'til I was dry Still sometimes I get a strange pain inside Oh Joey if you're hurting...

Love of a Lifetime was recorded in 1990 and released in 91. Ancient history. Probably forgotten by most who lived through those years. FireHouse was not a huge band (though their hair was), but they did have radio hits, of which this was their biggest. Sadly, I heard the lead singer passed a while back, but not before realizing how many people got married to this song, which he wrote.  Why am I, in 2025, writing about a song popular on the radio in 1991? Because, when the opening chords played all those years ago, I was captivated. I sat by the radio until it played (it was on heavy rotation) and taped it, believe it or not. I knew — someday — I would have the same kind of love he sang about.  It wasn't the first time I noticed an obsessive streak in myself. When I find something interesting or compelling, I chase it down every dark and winding path. (My last name actually means to hunt or to chase a defeated foe. It's an old name, now believed to be of Dutch origin, though we...

Killing Me Softly With His Song was released by Roberta Flack in 1973, which is ancient history for me, as I wasn't born. But good songs have good bones, and good bones hold up to the creeping sands of time, which threaten to bury us all.  This song was written a couple years before Roberta recorded it, and many have since covered it to varying degrees of popularity. One of the most notable covers was The Fugees  (1996), before Lauryn Hill left to pursue a solo career. I recall owning The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill, which is a good album.  In the hands of an artist, the meaning of a song can change. Roberta's version reveals the song is about a touching moment between a musician and a woman in the crowd. It's as if the man knew her deepest thoughts and desires, even her pain.  In the hands of the Fugees, it became a lost-love or unrequited-love song. It's not a love song, as we don't do happy songs anymore. They don't sell. What sells is poignancy and pain, an ...

This video (and she has others that go deeper) does a good job explaining how the Charlie Kirk false flag will be used to create a *turning point* in this nation. A turning point to the New World Order's New Age religion, of course.  If you're new to the idea that the far right and Christianity has been taken over by Jesuits intending to create a one-world religion, hang on. It gets heavier. This isn't new. They were completely in control of Hitler's regime, and we brought those Nazis (Jesuits) to America after the war (Operation Paperclip). People talk about "Hitler's pope," but, honey, it was the other way around.  You can deep dive this stuff until you're blue in the face. There is a spiritual power at work as a result of this "assassination," but I'm afraid it's not the God of the Bible. It is a false revival, but we can pray that this, too, is used for God's purposes. If God shows you the opposition, He intends for you to fig...

The storm blew up while we were a mile from home. As luck would have it, neither of us checked the forecast. The rain never lasts long, but today it did, driving everyone inside. We were alone on the sidewalk, running now. We laughed because it happened so fast. We were soaked within seconds. Glad  I didn't bring my phone. Our happy, little walk turned into a fiasco, but we didn't seem to mind.  When my key hit the lock, I exhaled a sigh of relief. We stripped to our underwear there in the hallway, and you took a shower first. I wondered what was taking so long, but soon you were out and laying on the bed, a towel wrapped around your hair and a soft robe around your still shivering body. I showered quickly and joined you, throwing a fuzzy blanket over us. We laughed at the stupidity of running in the rain when we were already wet, then taking showers after, as if that fixed anything. We were still chilled, and you took off your robe and pressed yourself against me — not as an ...

This post is addressed to a particular person who won't read it, as she permanently left my life more than a year ago. However, forgiveness is, by its nature, selfish. This is for me. Because I made a public display of my affection for her and the outfall of whatever it was we had, I felt it necessary to make a public declaration of forgiveness. Again, this isn't for anyone but me. I must forgive. I do forgive. I have forgiven. I will forgive. As many times as it crosses my mind, I forgive.  There were no words to describe what happened. It was the single biggest hurt of my already painful life. Some may say it wasn't that bad, but it's not on them to decide. The one who was hurt decides how they feel. It sent me to a primal, destructive place from which I am still returning. There is no doubt I loved her, and still there exists a residue of God's love in my heart for her, but my feelings were staunched long ago.  It was the single saddest thing that happened to me....